This is a story about an important life lesson that I learned. It opened my eyes and gave me the energy and trust to challenge my status and my life path. I want to share with you parts of my journey with hope that maybe these will inspire and help you in your own path, finding guidance and support, as you are not alone in this.
Here we go…
13 years ago I felt unaccomplished in my personal life and somehow stuck in this feeling. I was at a point in my life where I was longing for my soul mate.
At the same time, I was completely in the comfort zone in my professional life and thought that I had a good life. I didn’t feel that I needed to change anything and my future looked promising to me.
And while I was not feeling happy with my personal life, I had at a certain moment a discussion with a close friend who eventually dropped this remark: ‘Your love life will never change if you don’t DO something’. For me this was a breakthrough point. At that moment, I realized he was right, it was up to me to shape my life. Everything started to be clearer to me.
Until that point, I was spinning in a draining loop, complaining a lot, but not changing anything into my routine to step out of this. Clearly I needed to make a change to pull myself out of this loop. But what? I decided I need a break to reach a clear mind and reflect on my next move. And so I did! I spontaneously booked a city break in Rome, joined by my best friend. This spontaneous action seemed to me just a needed break, hoping to come back with a clearer mind about how I want to move forward.
They say that all roads lead to Rome. Well, to my big surprise, on my way back to the airport returning to Romania, in the subway in Rome, I met my soulmate, who later became my dear husband. When I booked that trip I had no idea how such a small action not related to my main topic, would pull me from the draining loop and would change the path of my life. I stepped into another loop at that time, but this time an exciting new loop. Since then, I moved to 2 other countries on 2 different continents, I discovered new cultures, I had 2 kids, I changed jobs, I transformed and continued to learn so much, and grew as a human. With just the small step of booking that trip I became actor of the life I was longing for. Looking back to these past 13 years, I recognize a common pattern: each time I decided to step out of my comfort zone, DO ‘a crazy thing’ and ACT for something, I grew in my life a little bit more. Stepping out of your routine, acting toward a change is not easy, it takes a lot of courage and yes, there is always a risk that things could not go how you envision them. But if you take measured risks, you have a plan and you are consistent with your actions, there are big chances that you will get where you should be. In any case, by taking action you will discover new things about yourself, about life and what you actually need. You will probably get to a new destination that may be more suitable to you. Either way, you will have learned something! This fact is also sustained by neuroscience. When building new projects, when acting on something, depending on what type of activity we perform, a cocktail of ‘happy hormones’ (as Loretta Breuning in "Habits of a happy brain" likes to call them) is released in our body and will help us keep on going. Dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin and endorphins fuel us on this journey. There are so many changes we can do in our lives and each one of them is unique, depending on who we are and the specific context of our lives. Yes, jumping without a safety net could be scary. And self-doubt and fear of failure could also kick in sometimes. All emotions are normal. And when you feel overwhelmed by these emotions, try to reach out for support. Having someone by your side who understands you and has good tools to help you in these times, may be what you need to get back to yourself, gain clarity and take control over your own path. No matter what decision you take, reflect on this: if you stay still, right where you are, with your big dreams and without taking the smallest step, nothing will change in your life. Next year, you might find yourself at the same point as today. And if you feel you would like to share a life changing step you took please reach out and let us discover your journey too.
I’m with you,
Arina
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