Welcome! This is the first interview from a series called ‘Everyday heroes’, about apparently regular, simple people in our lives, who, if we take a closer look, have an incredibly rich and inspiring story to share. The purpose of this series of conversations is to share with you deep lessons, simple tips and inspiring life stories from everyday heroes, who take on this role genuinely, by being themselves and living with purpose. I hope you will enjoy them and you will find something precious to take away and apply in your life, and be your own everyday hero.
This is a conversation with my mother, Felicia. She is the person who through her way of being contributed to the person that I became. I learned so much from her and she has always been a source of inspiration for me. Today, on International Women’s Day, I want to thank my mother for the good seeds of wisdom that she planted in me, by offering her the context to share her story with you, her life lessons and challenges, hopes and dreams.
Tell us about yourself, where do you come from?
I was born in Romania, in the city of Blaj, in February 1954. This was the month with the hardest winter in the history of Romania.
My parents were simple people and initially we used to live in Bucharest. But as my father was working in the army, the whole family had to move around the country according to his missions. That's how it happened when I was born.
We were three children in the family, my big sister, myself and our little brother.
Later we returned to Bucharest where I finished my studies, high school and post-secondary school of civil installations. Also here, I founded my own family, from which you, Arina, were born.
What would be the word that best describes your life so far?
As I am a really optimistic person, hope is the word that would best describe me. I always thought I had a good life, although for sure was sprinkled with many different moments, happy and less happy times, because that's how life is. In the end, hope that with each new day something good will come has never left me.
What are the values that guide you in life?
For sure, there are many values by which we can guide ourselves through life. Having faith in God, patience, honesty, a lot of love for people and doing my best to understand them made me live and go through life with my head held high. It gave me peace of mind and a good sleep at night. These are the main values that keep me alive and determined to move forward. This is why when I wake up in the morning, I’m grateful to be healthy and excited to start a new day of life.
What was the biggest challenge in your life and how did you cope with it?
My biggest challenge was the exam from the Faculty of Theatre (IATC) in 1973. Optimistic by nature, I thought I would cope with this challenge. Unfortunately, it wasn't like that! It was a predictable failure as I didn’t prepare enough. ‘My talent’ and the unconditional support of my family were not enough. It was a tough exam, only four places available and hundreds of candidates.
My family helped me to get over this disappointment. I was lucky enough to always have my parents by my side.
The biggest regret about this experience is that I didn’t know at that time how to persist. I had regrets that I abandoned this too easily. But now, I somehow made peace with this experience, and I think that this is the way things had to be.
What was your biggest success in life and how did you enjoy it?
It's hard for me to say what is the biggest success of my life so far. My life was full of many small and big joyful moments. I think it also depends on how we perceive the experiences that we go through.
If I would have to choose a single success, the most important thing for me in life is family. I succeeded to have a beautiful family, I have a husband who understood me and still understands me after 43 years of being together (sprinkled with good and less good moments, because this is how life is) and a child, a wonderful, smart and beautiful girl, of which I am proud. And my family has expanded in the recent years, with two grandchildren, lovely angels of whom I am very proud too.
Do you think you've found balance in life? If so, what helped you? If not, what blocked you?
Yes, I'm sure I've found balance in life. I believe I have found balance because of my faith in God and hope that always tomorrow will be a better day. I don’t consider myself a bigot, I am not guided by an excessive passion for religion, but with faith and hope I managed to get over all the problems I had in life and managed to move on with serenity, keep standing tall.
What would be something that you thought was very important in life and turned out not to be?
Very late I realized that in life we shouldn’t exaggerate with anything. We are too busy "chasing". For sure we want a job that we like, a family, a house, a car and so on. But in the end, by running to have ‘everything’, we might not have enough time to "be". We must try to be moderated in our chase; we don't take anything with us when we leave this world. I would have loved to know all these when I was younger and to love myself more, to give me more time to be. I'm not sorry about what I did in the past, but I regret that I couldn't or didn't know how to take better care of myself.
Based on your life experience, what is a lesson you would pass on to others?
I don't think I can give life lessons, but I would tell everyone to enjoy life more. Time is short, it passes quickly, and we realize too late that we can no longer do what we could have done when we were younger.
How do you want to continue the rest of your life?
I want to continue to live as I have lived until now in peace, harmony, love, with joy and gratefulness that I am healthy. Additionally, I would like to travel more, to be as much as possible together with my loved ones. And just as my hope and optimism have never left me, I am sure that I will be able to realize these desires as well.
Do you have in your life a person that would be brave enough to share her/his story? Or maybe you would like to share yours? Remember that there are infinite ways in which we can learn from each other, by sharing our experiences, good or bad, as in each one of them there’s something to learn and a growth opportunity. Please reach out to me at arina.filippi@gmail.com and I would be happy to join you (or your friend) in a conversation that could be shared on my blog and spread a positive impact with so many others.
I'm with you,
Arina
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